III
Blue may learn that it was seeing itself literally in a very limited light and of the futility of trying to strip itself of all blueness. Better to own your own blueness, your own purpleness, your own redness, and so on. All colors have their uses.
Even as these realizations may take place for Blue, it never really ‘transmutates’ to ‘White: ‘White (Enlightenment) is a myth.’ The radiation that ‘Blue‘ is may lose it’s identification with ‘Blueness‘ and then be fully able to see itself as showing up as all wavelengths, and one can call that a ‘truer’ Enlightement, but what’s really important is to be in touch with the fact that one shows up as blue, sometimes, red, sometimes, and so on. And that’s the part that is really important: to be in touch with how one is showing up this moment and to have intimacy with that. And the reason why that is what matters is because, right now, that’s all one’s got. All the rest is a story.
IV
This little model helps me explain people’s disillusionment with their spiritual teachers. In the same way we, as spiritual seekers, long to be White we want our teachers to be White, so that we have somebody in our life who we believe can show us the way. But n o b o d y is White.
‘White‘ is a story.
A spiritual master is somebody who is in touch with all her colors, AND who owns them when he or she shows up as that, and that equanimity with all colors is as White as it gets. When we don’t understand this and our teacher begins to show his or her blue and red and purple sides, we’re disillusioned. We attack them in our minds or write blog posts about them. We separate from them and I know that’s not wise because it all feels like pain. I know that because I’ve done it. It all stems from a basic confusion about what enlightenment is and is not, and about the deeper meaning of purity. The simple way to begin to clear up that confusion is to literally recognize that ‘Enlightenment is not what you think.’
This prompted me to write a little poem, which I dedicated to my friend Michelle Kassinger. We had a good time the other day talking about the matters that eventually became the ingredients for this post. Here it is.
I am aware of the colors I wear today
I am aware that those colors are not all that I am.
Allowing those insights to percolate right through my actions
So that I may live a life of balance
That’s the enlightenment that I know.
Then again, my blue is not your blue…my red is not your red.
Right on.
And that itself, another form of ‘blue’ or ‘red.’
Whatever I call them, to love them. That’s my job.
If we are everything (and nothing) we are all the colors (white). I don’t care of stories about colors. Today I shall take whatever I like.
i just love this… well, just the whole blog really, but this is special to me…i’m just sayin’
thanks!
I’m feeling grateful for this glimpse at unconditional love for colorful ME. I’m working on it.
Love it, love you Eduardo, Nina
“attacking them (the guru) in our minds or separating from them is not wise because it all feels like pain”
Can you absolutely know that is true for everyone just because it is true in your case?
First of all, when someone discovers that their guru is not who they have said they were and might even be the opposite, it is natural to want to find out more about this, to gather all the facts. If they have invested huge amounts of time, money and energy in him, and if the facts confirm that the guru has been lying about his enlightened state, his actions and intentions, for example, then it is natural to feel tricked.
To say that it would be more painful to separate from this guru is presumptuous. It might in fact feel extremely freeing. Maybe it is only one’s adherence to a spiritual concept or a “should” that would lead one to believe that separation is not healthiest course of action. If that were the case then non-separation would be forced and not self-loving.
If one decides that separation is the best course of action, then honest evidence of the guru’s hypocracy can be healthy to gather. When relationships are broken, it eases the pain that naturally occurs to take stock of what we are being spared of by not chosing to continue the relationship, or if the guru choses to end the relationship with us for that matter.
To an outside person who has a ’should’ against to negative evidence gathering, this can be construed as attacking.
Yes, you’re right. I only speak for my experience. Separating from another human being, any human being, is painful for me. And that doesn’t mean that I have to continue to expose myself to people that are not kind to me! There are two ways to physically and emotionally move away from a relationship that isn’t working: one is in peace and one in stress. Both get the job done, but one is more efficient, in my opinion. From having tested it I learned that ‘Loving what is’ is NOT the same as putting up with what seems unhealthy or unfair to me. By all means, if you’re in an abusive relationship, get out, and get out fast. And if you feel the need to gather what you call ‘negative evidence’ to make yourself feel better about the decision that you made, please do so. What’s most important is that you do what feels right for you. As you said: there are no ’shoulds.’
I see your point of the article as well Eduardo and it is a good one.
I only caution that it is a slippery slope to try to maintain a relationship with a guru from a new stance as the guru environment is completely set-up to support the idea that the guru is special and one step above everyone else. I don’t know as I have never tried it because when my rose-colored glasses have been removed, so has my motivation to enter the guru’s environment.
But I speculate that it would be an amazingly transformative experience for the follower. I am happy that it is possible for you. I am open to learning more about how you did it and what it was like for you.